Quick Tips on How to Build Trust in your Relationship

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By: Jennine Estes, MA

It is very important to show your partner that you are trust-worthy....and here are some quick tips.

1. Follow through with what you say. If you tell your partner that you will be home by 8:00, come home no later than 8:00pm. If you are going to be late, call them and let them know ahead of time.
2. Don't be unrealistic. Avoid saying that you will "Always" have your cell phone on or you will "Never" turn your phone off. This is unrealistic. Sometimes your phone will die or you might forget it or you might not hear it ring. Instead, tell your partner that you will try your best to answer the phone. And then....follow through with what you say (tip #1).
3. Let your Partner in. If you have a wall up, it hides things and creates a suspicious feeling from your partner. Avoid the suspicious behavior and be an open book. The more open you are, the more trust you can build.
4. Keep your eyes on your goal. Body language speaks louder than words....and so does your eye focus. If you are talking to your partner and a beautiful woman walks by, keep your eyes on your partner. If your goal is to build trust, then your actions have to show it. If you want your partner to be self-conscious, then keep looking at other women. It is your choice.
5. Make time for Communication. Communication can create a safe and comfortable feeling in your relationship. The more communication and feelings of safety, the more the trust can build.

If you have a history of trust being broken in your relationship, it might take more than these behaviors. You will have to resolve the past so it doesn't interfere with your current behaviors. Possibly working with a professional therapist can help.

Jennine E. Estes, M.A., Marriage and Family Therapist Intern, IMF#47211, Supervised by Mark Kaupp, MFC#33213 Visit http://www.EstesTherapy.com.


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